“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
― Maya Angelou
“I want to work to do makeup on set.” I had lived in LA for less than a year. I was working in a restaurant waiting for my cosmetology license to transfer when I decided that I would no longer go back to a salon life. I enjoyed working in a salon, but I needed a change of pace. I wanted to be a part of what I saw on television, so I turned my focus on freelancing on set. I didn’t know how I would make it, but I knew I was right where I was supposed to be. I had no idea what this entailed or how I would do it, but I trusted that it would happen. A few months after moving to LA I went through a breakup and was looking to rent a room. As chance would have it, I ended up living in Venice with someone who would give me the connections I needed. This was the start of everything.
My first job on set was assisting a very colorful makeup artist on a Disney shoot. This particular artist was known for having emotional outbursts while on set. As an observer, I would notice how the crew and talent would react around this. One moment he would be happy, then the next he would begin screaming, and the entire mood would change. The air would thicken, and everyone around him would tense up. I had moments where I didn’t know if I should continue, yet I had this burning desire to see where this path would take me. After some time I landed on my first solo show. I made more connections and made sure that I applied all of the knowledge I learned while assisting. I introduced myself to every person on the crew and that I always spoke kindly. I would be the person I wish I had while assisting.
Early in my career, I realized how powerful words and touch are. There are times where my clients will share things that they wouldn’t share with their therapist, making a connecting that spans past the hair or makeup service. Clients will share their happiest moments and also unload all of their insecurities and worries. I’m a profoundly empathetic person who feels how others are feeling like my own. I began to notice a pattern between my work and interaction with clients. If I had an off day something would be off in either the service or communication. I would carry the guilt of this interaction for a long time, beating myself up for what I should have said or did. I didn’t know to turn the empathy off, it was a blessing yet a curse. It made me more relatable, but I also felt like I was continuously carrying unseen baggage.
Every day for the last 2 years I’ve meditated consistently. It’s been my saving grace and the reason that I’m able to serve others. Whenever I meditate, I unload all of the garbage that I’ve been holding on to and clear my mind. I can handle stressful situations without cracking, and I’m a better listener. If you’re in a career where you’re of service to others self-care is vital. Before starting any job I take a few moments in my car to breath, setting my intention for the day. I’ve even gone to the bathroom in stressful situations and gathered my thoughts, taking some moments to meditate and clear my emotions. Returning more calm and graceful than I left.
Here are a some self-care tips:
Make a conscious decision to breathe, when we are in stressful situations we have a tendency to hold our breaths. When we hold our breaths we stop precious life force energy that will carry us through difficulties.
If you’re around negative people, acknowledge the negativity as theirs and not your own and breath.
Get massages often. Energy gets trapped in the body, leaving us fatigued. Massage helps to loosen the muscles and relax.
Be alone in nature with your own thoughts.
Be kind to yourself so that you can be kind to others.
Your energy and words impact those around you. Whether you realize it or not you have a direct effect on what happens around you. The way you speak and interact with others not only leaves a lasting impression, but it dictates how your future will be. Your energy can make a difference to someone’s day. Know that you can change the situation you’re in simply with your thought and breath. You are more powerful than you realize.
Here is a wonderful meditation to help you through stressful times:
One Minute Breath
Sit in a meditation posture. Inhale for 20 seconds, hold for 20 seconds, exhale for 20 seconds. If this is too difficult inhale for 10 seconds, hold for 10 seconds, exhale for 10 seconds.
Optimized cooperation between the brain hemispheres
Dramatic calming of anxiety, fear and worry
Openness to feeling one’s presence and the presence of spirit
The whole brain works, especially the old brain and the frontal hemispheres